Adventures in Vladimir

My Favorite Cosmetics

2007-04-27T01:34:00.000-07:00

1) toothpaste: why can't I buy herbal toothpaste with myrrh and eucalyptus at home?

2) "Wash and Go"/Pert Plus knockoff, which is economical and amuses me because the label is in English

More Signs You've Been in Russia Too Long

2007-04-25T08:15:00.000-07:00

A longer list is posted at http://peacecorpsonline.org/messages/messages/467/3677.html

Here are the ones I found personally relevant:

1. You have to think twice about throwing away an empty instant coffee jar.
2. You carry a plastic shopping bag with you "just in case".
3. You say he/she is "on the meeting" (instead of "at the" or "in a" meeting).
5. You answer the phone by saying "allo, allo, allo" before giving the caller a chance to respond.
6. You save table scraps for the cats living in the courtyard.
7. When crossing the street, you sprint.
8. In winter, you choose your route by determining which icicles are least likely to impale you in the head (this is a real problem that actually results in deaths each year when the ice melts and icicles fall)
9. You are impressed with the new model Lada or Volga car.
10. You hear the radio say it is zero degrees outside and you think it is a nice day for a change.

11. You argue with a taxi driver about a fare of 30 rubles ($2) to go 2 kilometers in a blizzard.
12. You are pleasantly surprised when there is toilet paper in the WC at work.
13. You are thrown off guard when the doorman at the nightclub is happy to see you.
14. Your not sure what to do you when the traffic cop only asks you to pay the official fine.
15. You wonder what the tax inspector really wants when she says everything is in order.
16. You plan your vacation around those times of the year when the hot water is turned off.
17. You are envious because your expat friend has smaller door keys than you have. Keys can double as self-defense weapon.
18. You go mushroom and berry picking out of necessity instead of recreation.
19. You know seven people whose favorite novel is "The Master and Margarita".
20. You change into tapochki (slippers) and wash your hands as soon as you walk into your apartment.

21. You can read bar-codes, and you start shopping for products by their country of production.
22. You know more than 60 Olgas.
23. You wear a wool hat in the sauna.
24. You put the empty bottle of wine on the floor in a restaurant.
25. You are rude to people at the airport for no reason.
26. You have to check your passport for an arrival-in-Russia date.
27. You think metal doors are a necessity.
28. You no longer feel like going to your "home" country.
29. You don't feel guilty about not paying on the trolley.
30. The elevator aroma seems reassuring somehow.

31. You no longer think washing clothes in the bathtub is an inconvenience.
32. You have to take E S L lessons before you go home.
33. When you know the Moscow Metro better than you know the subway system back home.
34. A weekend anywhere in the Baltics qualifies as a trip to the West.
35. You start buying Russian toilet paper.
36. You never smile in public when you're alone.
37. You know the official at the metro station/airport/border post/post office/railway station etc. etc. is going to say "nyet", but you argue anyway.
38. When you save tea-bags of Yorkshire Tea brought over specially from home to use for a second cup later....
39. When that strange pungent mix of odours of stale sawdust, sweat and grime in the metro makes you feel safe and at home....
40. When the word "salad" ceases for you to have anything to do with lettuce.
41. When mayonnaise becomes your dressing of choice

Subotnik

2007-04-25T06:02:00.000-07:00

The Russian answer to spring cleaning is the tradition of subotnik, which began as an actual holiday during Soviet times, and now seems to generally refer to the idea of taking a day after the snow melts to clean everything up. A few weeks ago, all of the teachers and staff got together to clean up the trash, beer bottles and potato chip wrappings that had been thrown down the hill and crept into our yard. You can see Molly and I were hard at work as we meditated to help inspire everyone else's efforts.

Clockwork Orange

2007-04-19T23:49:00.000-07:00

I've never seen the movie, but I recently read the book for the first time (in English). During the same week, my host brother discovered the book and read it (in Russian). Late one night at the dinner table, we realized we'd both just completed it and fell into an intense discussion.

He was amazed that Anthony Burgess had so clearly foreseen and aptly described what is now a serious problem in Russia - skinheads. The story could fit a description of senseless group violence in any country. However, the slang Burgess invents in the book is based on the transliteration of Russian. It was a little odd for me, reading late one night in my apartment, to open the book and see Russian words staring back at me in Latin script.

Russia can be generally hostile towards anyone who isn't white. A few semesters back, one of the teachers here (a woman) was part Italian. During her first semester, if I have my history straight, she was stopped twice by the police and actually detained at the police station at one point because they thought she was a Chechen terrorist photographing the marketplace. She left Russia earlier than planned.

Skinheads feed on this type of mentality and target "outsiders" to be killed.

The student attack described in the news clip below happened in Sept 06 to someone studying in my friend's class at St. Petersburg State University:

"On a Sunday night at 9:00 pm, an Asian-American student began walking home from an internet café on Nevsky Prospect. While walking, the student noticed a group of four young men behind him. Out of concern, and because he was still on a street full of people and cafés, the student stepped to the side and let the group pass by. All of the men where in their early twenties and were dressed in normal street clothes and none had shaven heads. Once the group passed, the student began to walk again. The group looked back from time to time. Once the student entered the first street without cafés or Kiosks, three or four more youths arrived and the two groups eventually sandwiched the student. Luckily, the student happened to be at his front door when this occurred and as he had a keypad lock, was able to enter swiftly. As he rushed inside the door, one youth jabbed an 8-inch kitchen knife at the student's throat, missing and hitting his hooded sweatshirt. The student was able to push closed the door and enter his apartment safely."

I have another friend who is a bit leery of the metro station at Nevsky prospect since a few years ago, his friend (Middle Eastern) was killed when a group of skinheads pushed him onto the tracks of an oncoming train.

Here are a few notes from the St. Petersburg Times: "In 2004 a Syrian student was pushed to his death under a metro train and a Vietnamese student bled to death, after being stabbed 37 times. The same year, the ethnologist Nikolai Girenko was also murdered in St Petersburg. In April, Lamzar Samba, a communications student from Senegal, was leaving a nightclub with a group of friends when he was shot dead in an alley. There was a swastika on the gun."

In an interview, one Congolese student explained "My friend, Roland Eposeka, who came from Congo like me, was murdered six months ago. He was studying forestry. He was on his own, just going to the local shop, when four youths fell on him and knifed him. The police are indifferent, at best. There is more law and order in Brazzaville than here."

And that's just a small sampling.

This month, like in many other years, several Moscow universities have ordered foreign students to stay in their dorms for the next 3 days because of concerns about ethnic violence before Hitler's birthday weekend. These restrictions are explained as a "fire drill".

Now, skinheads have started to turn on anyone who is "different", including fellow Russians. Students belonging to other subcultures - punks, goths, etc. are also being attacked.

You Can Go Your Own Way

2007-04-19T23:40:00.000-07:00

A piece of political commentary from St. Petersburg?

Around Town

2007-04-19T05:55:00.000-07:00

While walking around making a welcome video for the new teachers, we stopped in front of Uspensky (Assumption) Cathedral to take a few pictures.

Hanging out by the Hermitage

2007-04-14T04:50:00.000-07:00

In the square in front of the museum, a large group of soldiers was practicing for a parade (it will be next month). Watching them walk in squares and rehearse the music again and again, I laughed, suddenly knowing what I looked like to other people a few years ago.

When practice finally finished, everyone split into smaller social groups, clustering around their musical instrument of choice.

But what gave me the biggest smile was the group of children on a field trip, doing their best to imitate the movements of the soldiers.

Bogalubova

2007-04-14T04:10:00.000-07:00

I don't even know how to spell it in English. But it's beautiful, and it's just outside town. Molly, Aaron and I went Wednesday morning to visit the women's monastery and the Church of the Intercession, which is on the UNESCO list.

I went once before, in the middle of winter. The way to the Church of the Intercession is not really marked with signs. You have to turn right after passing a hospital, and then cross over some train tracks in order to find the path. Since I'd been before, I was our guide. Boy, was that a mistake. Naturally, I couldn't remember where to turn and we got lost. We wandered the whole river trying to figure out where to cross and how to get over the train tracks. We crawled up and down stairs. I jumped across a stream and climbed up a hill. I could SEE the church, but I couldn't figure out how to get there.

Finally, we met an old man, who rode his bike to the forest and was chopping some wood. He probably thought we were crazy, but he did point us back toward town, which was closer to the trail.

We finally found the crossing point, though we were still off the main path a bit. After grumbling on the way there, we discovered a way home that was, actually, well-marked and included signs.

Peter Paul Fortress

2007-04-08T12:19:00.000-07:00

We made an early morning excursion to see Peter Paul Fortress. I’ve tried to visit the fortress on two prior trips. Russia’s English translation claims the fortress was a magnificent achievement that would surely have thwarted any attack, while English guidebooks tell me it was poorly designed and would have been little help in a crisis. The most noteworthy facts I gathered were that it housed “political prisoners” and was also a rocket development site in the 1920s. Not coincidentally, today the fortress hosted a model rocket competition and a small street fair.

We met Peter the Great (sorry Peter, I had a Pushkin moment, the other town obsession) and I took a picture in front of his statue. Many visitors sit on his lap, but I was somewhat skeptical and also afraid of paying a “tourist fine”.

My sister discovered a secret passage. It was hard to find. I bravely scouted for any suspicious characters as we looked around the hideout.

There was also a concert at the church, which played different bells throughout the day.

Absolutely Insane

2007-04-07T11:08:00.000-07:00

I traveled to St. Petersburg to spend the weekend with my sister. Earlier this afternoon, I was reading the comics (courtesty of a package from home) while she was taking a shower. The doorbell rang a few times and there was a lot of knocking on the door. I looked through the peephole. A very distraught, elderly woman stood outside.

Now, I should have known better. There is a rule in Russia that you NEVER open the door for someone you don't know. Generally, I follow this rule. In America and Russia. But she seemed so innocent and distressed. And I'm an experienced world traveler. In pretty good physical shape. A war veteran, even. Opening the door to talk to an old woman seemed like an OK plan. Surely, someone was dying or giving birth. Better to see what was the matter.

Before I could blink, she went barreling past me and INTO the bathroom, where she began yelling at my sister, who was still in the shower. Lots of words went back and forth, with my sister finally telling her to leave. The woman was indignant at being asked to go. My sister yelled that it was OUR apartment. I shoved her out the door and locked it while she was muttering something about our landlord's number and I was swearing in English.

A bit shaken, we both sat down on the couch. My sister wondered what on earth possessed me to open the door. I tried, feebly, to explain.

Apparently, the source of the woman's complaint was that repairs were being done in her apartment (including the pipes) and she thought we were responsible for water leaking into her room. Clearly, this justified her barging into the bathroom of a naked stranger and hollering at them.

We called the landlord, who showed up not long after we hung up the phone. He was sorry to hear of our trouble, and examined the pipes while making jokes to distract us. He said there's nothing wrong with the plumbing. He told us to use as much water as we want. He said to call him if she shows up again.

After he left, I took an unnecessarily long shower. I think everything's ok now, but it's the craziest thing I've ever seen, and I can't even imagine how my sister must have felt.

My Girls

2007-04-05T08:26:00.000-07:00

Molly invited me to join her class (mostly my old students from last semester) on a field trip to the food court in the new mall. I couldn't resist. It was great to see them all again. They teased me about my progress in Russian. I passed out copies of my address in America. They sent me on a guilt trip about not teaching next year. I promised to visit Russia. I love these girls.

Why You Love McDonalds When You're Abroad

2007-04-05T08:01:00.000-07:00

Of all the things I've lost, I might miss American restrooms the most.

The notion of free, public restrooms does not exist in Russia. If you want to use the bathroom, you have to pay for it (usually a little under $.50) After you give your money to the toll booth lady outside the bathroom, she gives you a piece of toilet paper. 2 squares, maybe 3 if you're lucky. One of the reasons I hoard napkins, tissue and toilet paper like a kleptomaniac.

Many toilets do not have seats OR they HAD seats which have been removed, for reasons I cannot fathom. I also cannot understand why I have to pay the toilet lady if the toilets are still covered in pee. What duties is the toilet lady responsible for, exactly? They do not include cleaning the restrooms or supplying soap for the sink.

Even in theaters and "nicer" public places, many toilets actually have no vertical components at all. Rather, there's a hole in the floor with space to carefully place your feet on either side. I'm sure this is all doing wonders for my legs.

Here you can see a picture of the toilet on the train, and a standard hole-in-the-floor toilet.

You are an obsession, You're my obsession...

2007-04-05T07:32:00.000-07:00

The entire country is obsessed with plastic bags. Also known as "pakets". Not bookbags or briefcases. Plastic bags. That's what you use to carry things.

As someone put it, there's nothing funnier than a teenager trying to look tough who's dressed all in black and carrying a plastic bag covered with pictures of roses.

At first, the plastic bags really bothered me. What happened to bookbags? Messenger bags? Something durable? Something more visually appealing, perhaps?

Now, I carry my socks to and fro in a grocery bag when I need to do laundry at school. It seems totally normal. When I have too many things, I just stuff some of them in the nearest bag, and take it with me wherever I'm going.

In Russian grocery stores, bags aren't free. You have to ask for them and pay, usually, 1 ruble per bag (not expensive, which almost makes me wonder why they bother). On the train to Moscow, when we stopped in suburban areas near the city, entrepreneurs crowded our compartment, hawking the virtues of the various pakets they had for sale. As this woman did, you can even find a booth at the market specializing in plastic bag sales.

It has led me to a new hobby. Bag-watching. Instead of people watching. You can sit on a train or a bus or in any public space and watch all the different bags passing by. You can compare and contrast their color, quality, age and contents. Like pets, you may search for a physical resemblance between pakets and their owners.

Food

2007-04-02T06:12:00.000-07:00

I made it to the first hour of English Conversation Club on Sunday evening, where we discussed one of my favorite subjects. Food. The question was, what food(s) would you miss from home if you went to another country?

I made a small list, which I shared with our group:

1) Water. Free drinking water, automatically provided to you at any restaurant. That you want to drink water versus some other beverage and that the water will not be carbonated - both facts are considered normal. I also miss being able to drink water safely out of the tap. Expansion: American hygiene makes a lot less sense when you have to pay for water. Also when the bathtub is more often than not heaped with drying laundry. I tend to alternate between hair-washing days and self-washing days. There's a separation, and it's flexible, depending on the status of drip-drying clothes.

2) Spices. Man, I miss spices. I like flavors. When I sprinkle black pepper on my noodles, like I did last week, it seems incredibly exotic. I forgot what it tasted like. For lunch today, I bought lettuce (just lettuce, because accompanying veggies are still a little pricey) and crumpled it into a bowl. I squished lemon juice on top, and added some salt. It was crazy.

3) Food Without Additional Dairy Products. I miss salad without mayonnaise, as I told you in an earlier post. Here, that's seen as a little strange. I do not feel any compulsion to add sour cream to my soup, but that's also obligatory. I'm sure there are other examples, but they fail me.

4) California produce. I was incredibly spoiled by a year-round supply of fresh, affordable, locally grown fruits and vegetables within walking distance of my apartment. Those days are gone.

5) Where's the Beef? I'm not a vegetarian, though during my time in CA, I started eating less meat and more veggies. But I'm still a fan of the occasional steak dinner, and that's something you can't replicate here. Although shashlik is good.

6) Novelty Items. On this list would be such things as Waffle House hash browns, chicken dumplings, hot wings, pumpkin pie, fried chicken, biscuits (which I actually made here once)and other delicacies that I miss being able to eat periodically. Though considering the fat/dairy ratio, I think a chain of Southern food restaurants would do well in Russia.

To be fair, I was then asked to catalog what foods I would miss from Russia. At the top of the list is shashlik (think BBQ/shish-ke-bab as the closest analogy). Followed by blini (Russian pancakes - thinner than ours) I like mine without butter (madness), but with jam and, alas, I now also enjoy sour cream and condensed milk, as well as honey. And kasha (the buckwheat kind, which many Americans dislike, but I love, possibly because I grew up with it). I could say I'll miss borscht but that would be a lie because Mom makes the best in town. Other people noted that they'd miss Russian black bread, Russian dairy products and Russian tea.

At the market in St. Petersburg we found lots of spices, even though no one ever cooks with them.

Marshrutka

2007-03-29T03:34:00.000-07:00

I want to tell you more about public transportation. In a way, it's great. It's more common and more accessible (unless you're handicapped) than in many American cities.

The most common ways to travel are on a bus, or a marshrutka. What is that? Well, a big van, full of very small seats, none of which have a seatbelt. The idea seems to be to fit as many people as possible inside, so seats are turned every which direction. There is often a pole running from floor to ceiling. If you are unfortunate enough to climb in when all the seats are taken, you and your drunken friends can just stand/scrunch under the ceiling and hold onto the pole until you reach your stop.

I have mixed feelings about the marshrutka. I appreciate its originality and functionality. It is uniquely Russian in the same way that no one, of any age, ever wears a seatbelt in a car. Ever. My decision to do so is viewed with the same shock as my insistence on drinking tea without sugar in it.

But, they're not very safe. I haven't had any problems, but there are stories of vans flipping over from carrying the weight of too many people. News stories actually comment on the safest place to sit on a marshrutka (behind the driver's seat).

Some pictures from others until I post my own.

Becoming a Russian

2007-03-29T03:15:00.000-07:00

From a friend in St. Petersburg, I offer the following list (in the hope she won't mind my sharing):

You might have been living here too long if:

* When the airline agent tells you that no flights are available within the week that you require, your first mental reaction is: "I wonder how much money it would take for her to change that."

* You jaywalk fearlessly, but approach walk signals cautiously.

* You refer to a heaping platter of cold cuts as a "salad."

* As soon as you enter any building, your first reaction is to look for a mirror.

* You are paying 11,000 more roubles in monthly rent than your official contract states --but that's okay, because you're earning 20,000 more roubles than your work contract states.

* You've cleaned your boots in a public restroom.

* You have some reservations about spending the rest of your life anywhere where you can't stroll down the street with an open beer in springtime.

* When you see a "Bridge Closed" sign, you assume that it doesn't apply to you.

* You visit formerly-public land that has recently been stolen for an oligarch, and join women in fur coats in trying to climb under or over the fence -- not as a political statement, but just because it's ochen' krasivo. OCHEN' krasivo! (very beautiful)

And especially for Petersburg:

* You think you've started to remember the blockade.

Return to Suzdal

2007-03-26T09:05:00.000-07:00

A pretty town about 30-40 mins by bus, I visited Suzdal last summer and wanted to go back before leaving Russia. Early Saturday morning, I snuck out with a friend and we spent a few hours walking around the city and visiting the churches. The bridge we needed washed out when the snow melted, and we had to walk a bit to find a new one. Along the way, we also found a (goat? I think...not good with farm animals...) whose owner wandered out in slippers to discuss the merits of his goat, and how he'd never had a wife but always wanted one, as we politely hurried away down the muddy trail. We said hello to several horses waiting patiently for any tourists that might like a buggy ride.

We walked for a long time, and then sat down and ate two pickled apples before walking back to the bus station. The bus station in Suzdal is just outside of town. They built it with room for several buses to park because tourism is such a significant part of the city's income. There must be at least 20 spaces for buses. They are all empty. No one appears to park there, except our bus from Vladimir, and sometimes one from Ivanova, or a local bus. All of the buses go directly into the city and park next to the major tourist attractions. It's a pity that the one time a Russian city really made an effort to cater planning to tourists, it didn't work out as expected.

PC Load Letter

2007-03-26T08:59:00.000-07:00

We found this on the street in Riga. (Note: It was the ONLY trash anywhere on the street). Office Space?

Stars on Ice

2007-03-22T05:35:00.000-07:00

One night, we went skating/dancing when no one else was around.

Bobsledding

2007-03-21T01:29:00.000-07:00

In Riga, for about $90 USD (a disproportionate share of this fee went to our hostel)you can go bobsledding in the nearby town of Sigulda. You're accompanied by a member of the Latvian National Team, who actually knows how to drive. I think the track was built as a practice site for the USSR team.

Sara and I piled in together. No directions. No instructions. No legal release forms to sign. No questionnaire about a history of neck or back problems. Just helmets for each of us, and a word from the driver, "Don't hit me with your helmet when we go down".

It was very fast. I tried to guess when curves were coming so I could shift weight with our driver. Mostly, I did not succeed. Somehow, I didn't realize when I watched bobsledding on TV, how strong the G forces actually were. If you weren't careful, your head jerked around all over the place. It was amazing.

Three Crosses

2007-03-19T06:42:00.000-07:00

RIGA GUIDEBOOK: Sunrise from the top of Three Crosses Hill is beautiful. So of course, we had to go.

Waking up early was agony. We went to sleep at 2 am, after an encounter with a group of drunken Brits. But we tumbled out of bed into our shoes and off we went. Clawing desperately at the side of a visually manageable yet physically exhausting hill, I wondered if it was the early hour or the months of potato diet that so effectively sapped my strength. Panic that I'd miss the sun kept me scrambling toward the top of the informal trail winding among the tree roots and semi-melted ice bits until we finally fell, exhilarated, into a clearing.

Later, we were quite proud of ourselves. "Didn't see anyone else on that hill."

We walked the streets until stores opened, which was not soon on a Saturday morning. Almost by accident, we discovered a small cafe with fresh baked goods literally coming out of the oven. We sat down to munch, among heaped pastry piles purchased to sample the full range of options - pastry with chocolate, with cream, with orange, with cherry - and "real" coffee.

Riga

2007-03-18T02:44:00.000-07:00

View from the top of a church tower.

Shifting Perspective

2007-03-18T02:15:00.000-07:00

I just went on *another* short break, and I'm still trying to catch up with myself. Apologies to all my regular readers. We just went to Riga, Latvia and Vilnius, Lithuania.

As we crossed the Russian border, I felt some release of tension that has accumulated just by living here the past few months. When we got to our hostel in Riga, the staff greeted us with a free beer for each person. You know your frame of reference has changed if life at a hostel seems like a dramatic step up from your current quality of life.

Tap water was drinkable, even without boiling for 10 minutes. Toilets were free, had lids, seats, a steady supply of toilet paper, flushed without overflowing, didn't smell like sewage and bathrooms weren't full of old shoes, newspapers, jars, bottles, cans, drying laundry or pets. Internet access was free, readily available, and lacked bandwith restrictions. Rooms were clean (well those sheets might be questionable) and well-lit. Staff was friendly and customer-service oriented. Coffee and tea were free for all guests.

During the trip, I suffered a bit from reverse culture shock. Everything felt so European. The streets were clean - no snow or dirt. No one spit on the streets. Streets weren't full of drunk, raging alcoholics at all hours of the day. I didn't see any potholes on roads or sidewalks. There was not a general state of disrepair, on streets or in buildings. I didn't see any 14 year olds running around with bottles of beer at 9 am. I was not accosted by a single drunk man. Taxi and bus drivers appeared to be sober.

Restaurants were friendly and seemed to want customers. You didn't have to wait for a long time and they didn't swear at you if they thought your group was too big. Tables weren't reserved for people who never showed up. The kitchen didn't close 90 mins before the restaurant did. Food used spices and salad didn't have mayonnaise on it. Half of the menu did not consist of cigarettes and the various types of vodka, cognac, beer, wine and other alcohol you could buy.

There were no traffic police hovering at 20 foot intervals to fine pedestrians for crossing without a signal, or cars whose drivers hadn't done anything illegal, but looked wealthy enough to pay bribes to avoid any 'trouble'. People on the street smiled, said hello, and even hugged you.

All in all, I was a little cranky on the train back...

I'm Melting

2007-03-18T02:12:00.000-07:00

The snow is disappearing rapidly - it's not all gone yet, but will be soon. A very short, very warm winter in Russia. And I still haven't been cross-country skiing. The weather has changed just enough that it's all drizzle, all the time. No sky, lots of clouds. I wonder how winter has fared across the rest of the world.

Those Hooligans

2007-03-05T09:13:00.000-08:00

They did it again. I swear, every time I reach a point in this job where I want to pull my hair out, my students set me right again. I've been sitting here trying to grade everyone's midterms, which I should have finished over the weekend. At the height of my exasperation, I learned one of my old students was downstairs looking for me. I stomped down the stairs, resenting the interruption to the moment I was having with my cup of coffee.

Thursday is "International Women's Day". Kind of like mother's day, but for all women. Like Valentine's Day, there's a run on sales of flowers and chocolate. On Wednesday, her college is having some sort of celebration/performance, in which she is taking part. She stopped by because she wanted to invite me to attend as her guest. I hope I can go. Sometime on Wednesday, we head to Moscow to catch the night train to Riga. It would be nice to fit both events in.

Shortly after saying good-bye to her, I was mugged by some of last semester's students, who all said they missed me and planted about 95 kisses on my cheek while hugging all the air out of my lungs.

Hooligans.

San Francisco Style

2007-03-04T01:36:00.000-08:00

Even the Bay Area food/fitness lifestyle craze is spreading

A Great Run

2007-03-04T01:17:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, we had a small break and I went to St. Petersburg to visit my sister. On the last day of my trip, a large group of us met up at a park for a hash run. During this run, which lasts about 40 minutes, you run as a group, looking for trail markings that tell you which way to go, and yelling "on, on!" to anyone behind you so they know you're headed in the right direction.

You can imagine the facial expressions of the Russians we passed, who were leisurely strolling about on a fairly cold day, as we went tearing by screaming "ON, ON!!". Here are a few pictures of our journey. The forest was beautiful.

After the finish, we trekked back to "CitiBar", across the street from the American Consulate. A great place, they let us stow our gear there during the run, and had real eggs benedict waiting when we got back (I called ahead to see if we could place an order since I had to leave for the train station right after we got back). Food has never tasted so good.

The Mighty Dollar

2007-03-04T01:03:00.000-08:00

Perhaps less mighty now, yet the dollar store is everywhere...

The Ants Go Marching One By One....

2007-03-04T00:56:00.000-08:00

In case anyone missed this important news flash (taken from FoxNews):

Swiss Troops Accidentally Invade Lichtenstein
ZURICH, Switzerland — What began as a routine training exercise almost ended in an embarrassing diplomatic incident after a company of Swiss soldiers got lost at night and marched into neighboring Liechtenstein.

According to Swiss daily Blick, the 170 infantry soldiers from the neutral country wandered more than a mile across an unmarked border into the tiny principality early Thursday before realizing their mistake and turning back.

A spokesman for the Swiss army confirmed the story, but said that there were unlikely to be any serious repercussions for the mistaken invasion. "We've spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it's not a problem," Daniel Reist told The Associated Press on Friday. Officials in Liechtenstein also played down the incident.

Interior Ministry spokesman Markus Amman said nobody in Liechtenstein had even noticed the soldiers, who were carrying assault rifles but no ammunition. "It's not like they stormed over here with attack helicopters or something," he said.

Liechtenstein, which has about 34,000 inhabitants and is slightly smaller than Washington, D.C., does not have an army.

A string of luck

2007-03-04T00:39:00.000-08:00

So I've been on holiday. Literally and figuratively. I took a small break from all commitments, written, electronic, and otherwise. In the spirit of honoring an "old Russian tradition", I kicked back and did nothing for a bit. It was nice. Now, I'm back. :)

After sending my final paper in, a series of fortunate events happened within the span of 24 hours. First, a package arrived in the mail with a very nice, embroidered jacket from Norwich University enclosed (a gift for finishing the last class). My teacher graded my paper incredibly quickly - sending back an "A" and a note that if I work on it, it might be publishable in the Journal of African Affairs. That night, some of my old students and the other teachers dragged me out to a local cafe, where we bought a bottle of wine and toasted my finishing school. AND I got a lucky ticket on the bus for my first time ever since moving here.

Let me explain. When you buy a bus ticket, it has 6 numbers on it. A "lucky" ticket is one where the sum of the first 3 digits equals the sum of the last 3 digits. (would this ever be a hobby in America?) If you get a lucky ticket, you're supposed to eat it. I didn't eat mine, but I did save it, and I was very excited.

Celebrate

2007-02-18T22:36:00.000-08:00

Why? Well, I am celebrating the completion of my master's degree today. You're invited to the party.

Much to the amusement of our security guard, I spent the night on the couch, after staying up until 2 am to finish my final paper.

Urrah! Finis :)

Surreality

2007-02-15T22:44:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, the juxtaposition of times and cultures is amazing.

On Sept 11th, there was a huge documentary on TV about the attacks against America. Everyone I knew was watching it. Some of my students came up to me to say they were thinking about America on this day. Newspapers and TV stations stopped by the school to "Interview the Americans and Discuss Their Feelings on the 9/11 Anniversary".

My host family sat me down on the couch with them so we could all watch the documentary together. Although I couldn't follow the words, certainly the story was familiar.

Afterwards, we sat and looked through some of my host mother's old photos, especially the ones from when she was a summer counselor for the Young Pioneers (communist youth organization during the Soviet Union).

How Does That Work, Exactly?

2007-02-15T22:42:00.000-08:00

In a surprising presidential election in Turkmenistan, Kurbanguly Berdymukhamedov won only 89% of the vote. Mr Berdymukhamedov had been acting-president since the death in December of Saparmurat Niyazov, who had ruled the country for more than two decades. The opposition was not allowed to field any candidates.

If you're the only person being voted for 1) what's the point? 2) How do you get anything other than 100% of the vote?

Happy Valentines Day

2007-02-15T07:37:00.000-08:00

To all the people I love in my life.

I don't usually "do" anything for this holiday, but some of my students brought chocolates and small cards to class last night. They're currently decorating my desk, which is piled with: apples, peanut butter, flash cards, a Skype headset, a bag of flour, an empty plate, a Big Sur article and Forbes Top 100 Companies to Work For 2007.

Underneath, on the floor: a bag of Starbucks Christmas blend, some Hershey kisses, and The Complete Fitness Ball Workout Kit.

It's like Margaret Thatcher's purse (which famously had everything you ever need in life inside), only on an Ikea table.

This is how I survive my days.

Off With Her Head

2007-02-08T07:10:00.000-08:00

Well, that's an easy way to get rid of folks you don't like...

President Authorized to Suspend Governors from Office
"On February 9, Russia’s State Duma will consider in the first reading the bill authorizing the president to suspend from office a governor should he/she face the criminal charges, irrespective of crime’s heaviness. The president will be entitled to remove a governor by application of the prosecutor general."

In the past few years, several governors have been charged with (not convicted of) various "crimes". This tactic has been used since 2004, when Putin enacted a law that did away with all popular elections for governors. Support for such centralized control by the Kremlin was not difficult to gain because of the Beslan school attack.

"Popular or not, an incumbent knows what could happen if he refuses to go quietly: They might be charged with abuse of office or mishandling finances... Samara Governor Konstantin Titov was charged Dec. 30 with endorsing a $10 million loan on preferential terms to a private firm that later disappeared. Vladimir Butov, governor of the Nenets autonomous district, was given a three-year suspended sentence Dec. 31 on charges of beating a traffic policemen. Butov insists that the case is politically motivated..." (from 2004)

Wall

2007-02-06T10:31:00.000-08:00

When you first arrive in a foreign country, the noise all around you is like a giant wall. Massive. Impenetrable. In a way, it's cool. Everyone else is restricted to reacting to the meaning of sounds. You can walk down the street in complete freedom. Separate. Independent. Utterly uninformed...

Gradually, cracks form in the surface of the wall. Little words start to slip through. Words for food and time and please and thank you. This is the stage I'm in now.

I think cracks continue to grow, and one day, the wall crumbles so you can see the other side. I wait for this day.

Until then, my Russian teacher has told me that I have no accent. Also no vocabulary. No grammar. But, no accent.

My New Business Idea

2007-02-04T02:05:00.000-08:00

Now that it really is winter in Russia I discovered that it's COLD (though not nearly as cold as last year). When I bundle up, my face is still freezing, and I don't see many ski masks for sale.

I have a better idea.

I'm going to invent a nose warmer. A fuzzy little strip you can put on top of your nose. Heated, like the hand warmers when you're camping. Also adhesive, so that it does nice things for your skin like Biore Clear Pore Strips.

And patches you can put on your cheeks, to keep them warm.

Wait, there's more. They'll come in different colors and designs. For children, you can buy special patterns, like a costume. So you could stay warm, and look like a mouse, or a cat or a tiger.

Global Warming

2007-02-04T01:49:00.000-08:00

It's real, people.

Russia's Hackers

2007-02-01T09:02:00.000-08:00

I think there may be a disproportionate number of geniuses in Russia. Certainly, there is a large population of highly-educated, incredibly smart (whether self-taught or in schools) citizens running around without very good jobs.

Let's examine this equation.

Smart people + limited opportunity = big problems

An interesting 2001 article by Wired News talks about the hacking/cracking culture in Russia. Stealing passwords, credit card numbers, and information from business or government websites, and finding/exploiting weaknesses in MS Windows and other operations systems is a lucrative business.

Moscow hacker pay: $109 USD ($3000 rubles) per job
College professor pay: $ 150 USD per month

In 1995, a man named Vladimir Levin removed $5.7 million dollars from Citibank accounts using his home computer and a dial-up connection.

You can buy password-cracking software on the street for about $4 USD.

There are some very sophisticated Russian hacking websites where you can download all sorts of nifty software/tools/security weakness information, look for jobs, trade notes, etc.

Atomic Beauty

2007-01-30T23:01:00.000-08:00

I've dedicated most any free second in the past 48 hrs to wrestling with a definitive conclusion to a paper about nuclear weapons of mass destruction. Naturally, I mentioned the accessibility of weapons-grade material from Russia or one of the former Soviet republics. But I completely overlooked the following story found at www.breitbart.com, which I would REALLY like to work in somehow:
Extra hot: Russian beauty contest for nuke power workers
Jan 30 10:57 AM US/Eastern

The nuclear power sector in Russia and across the former Soviet Union is inviting female employees to compete in Miss Atom-2007, a contest to discover the industry's most radiant beauty. "There are a lot of beautiful women in the Russian nuclear sector," said Ilya Platonov, who runs the www.nuclear.ru site and is organising the contest.

The number of applicants for the Miss Atom title has trebled since the first competition in 2004, Platonov told AFP, reaching 220 last year. Competitors must be aged 18-35 and work in the nuclear sector in Russia or other ex-Soviet states, or at least be studying nuclear science at university, Rosenergoatom, which runs Russia's nuclear power stations, said. They have until February 20 to send in photos and CVs to www.nuclear.ru. Voting will take place online and the winner and runners-up will later be given awards at a ceremony at Russia's atomic energy agency, Rosatom, in Moscow.

Road Rage

2007-01-29T22:04:00.000-08:00

Like many big cities, traffic in Moscow is terrible.

I found some interesting statistics about the traffic from Pravda.ru, where a study by the Academy of Forecasting noted:

Congestion Will Be a Serious Problem
Traffic in the city will come to a halt once the number of cars in Moscow exceeds 4.5 million, provided that there is no improvement in the city’s road intersections and parking lots. In total, the number of cars owned by Muscovites are slightly above 3 million these days. According to statistics, 10-15% of those cars move about the city at a time, while the remaining ones sit in parking lots or garages. With about 250 thousand cars on the roads, the traffic in the city creeps at a snail’s pace. The traffic will collapse once the number of cars on the roads exceeds 300 thousand at a time. The traffic in Moscow is expected to come to a standstill sometime around 2012.

Even more interesting was the emphasis on the credibility of our futurologists: The future of Russia’s capital is not told by some soothsayers gazing at the coffee grounds. Predictions are provided by experts holding academic degrees, employed by the Academy of Forecasting.

I wonder what it takes to be qualified as a futurologist?

Finally, the Economist relates that "An organisation called 'The Register of Non-Drinking Men', established to help Russian women find sober husbands, has a new mission. It has set up a website for people who are fed up with two- to four-hour commutes; stressed drivers can try to swap jobs with someone who lives nearer their workplace. It remains to be seen how successful this venture will be."

You can view their traffic website at http://www.antiprobka.ru/

Even though it's in Russian, there are some great illustrations that get the story across quite well. First, a picture flashes, saying "when you work near home" and it shows happy people and families smiling, fishing and spending time together. Then, a second picture flashes, with the caption "when you work far from home", with angry people on the roads and crowding into the metro.

Dear Mr. President

2007-01-28T22:36:00.000-08:00

I have been searching long and hard for the appropriate Russian souvenir. I have a small, traditional collection of nesting dolls, lacquer boxes, and scarves, but I wanted something more. Something different. Something unusual.

During a trip to GUM, I found it at last. Mr. Putin likes to keep an eye on his country, and in honor of his leadership, I decided to purchase my very own Vladimir Putin Coffee Mug. Now, he and his watchful eye can travel everywhere, with ease.

The Ubiquitous Pig

2007-01-26T10:53:00.000-08:00

Russia really, *really* celebrates the New Year. First, there was the "regular" New Year on December 31, 2006. Then there was the "old" New Year (lunar calendar) which came in January.

This is also the Year of the Pig.

So, they were selling pigs everywhere. Stuffed animals. Calendars. Pictures. Keychains. Even LIVE pigs. Real ones. (Charlotte's Web, anyone?) At the market, people walked around carrying pigs and trying to sell them. One of my classes gave me this handy stretchy pig to put in a window or in the car.

I asked my sister about this, wondering how it is that Russia celebrates the astrological new year. She just shrugged and observed, "Russia is next to China".

Russians love holidays and superstitions, so I guess it makes sense. I have just one question: What will we do when it's the Year of the Rat?

How to Make Friends and Influence People?

2007-01-25T09:18:00.000-08:00

Answer: Feed them.

Last night, I began teaching conversation class (two of them). Sometimes it's hard to get everyone started, especially at the beginning. So, I passed around a plate of M&Ms and told everyone to take two. One was to eat and one should be saved.

Although they didn't know it yet, each color corresponded with a topic (yellow-hobbies, orange-family, brown-school or work, red-New Years, green-something funny or happy). To my relief, it was a great icebreaker and I didn't even have to invent more topics for the rest of the class. I sat back and the conversation steered itself as everyone took turns sharing and asking each other questions.

I noticed last semester that food began to play an increasingly important role in my classroom. Perhaps because I like to eat. I started making tea sometimes, for my students, and then it led to occasional cooking spurts, and somehow spiraled into a grand project in one class where the discussion topic was "food" and I made everyone bring something to eat.

Having become more of a food junkie since living near San Francisco, and reading more about business as I try to decide what to do next in life, I was delighted to find a NY Times article the other week noting that cooking is increasingly being used as a team-building activity outside of work. So if you don't just want to drive the golf cart around and heckle people, which is what I usually do when I'm trying to "golf", you can set up your very own "Iron Chef" style competition/gathering at a local restaurant. Check it out.

http://select.nytimes.com/gst/abstract.html?res=F10B13F938540C708DDDA80894DF404482&oref=login

Diplomacy Karaoke?

2007-01-25T02:56:00.000-08:00

This is slightly off topic, but I had to share. I'm currently working on an M.A. in Diplomacy from Norwich University. I have two papers left to write, and I will finally, finally graduate this summer! In June, I'll fly out for "residency week" which is an opportunity to present our papers, meet classmates and have a little bit of fun.

Today I received an electronic survey soliciting input for possible activities:

The Diplomacy Program
1. Please rank the following activities in order of preference (1-5).
Online Strategy Games
Diplomacy Charades
Diplomacy "who wants to be a millionaire?"
Karaoke
Diplomacy Movie and Discussion
2. Please suggest some diplomacy-related movie titles.
3. Other Activity Suggestions:

That's right folks, diplomacy charades. I'll work on my best impression of American unilateralism. And I don't know what we could sing. If you have any bright ideas for movies, songs, or activities, let me know. It's official. I'm a geek.

SNOW

2007-01-21T22:43:00.000-08:00

SNOW!!! That's how long it takes for rain to go away...from mid-November until 21 January. I don't know if it will last, but we finally have snow in Russia. And all seems right with the world.

Yesterday I met with one of my students. She and I spent a few hours in a cafe, then walked in the park for about an hour. I took photos of the church, the park, the snow, and there's even one of me. I want to ride the horse sometime.

Change

2007-01-19T11:28:00.000-08:00

Not that kind of change. I'm talking about money. Change is a precious commodity here. There aren't enough smaller bills to go around and it's hard to get change. If you go to the store and you don't have exact change, people give you the evil eye. If you have a 1000 ruble note they might get upset and refuse to sell you something.

The most reliable place we've found that accepts "large" bills (equal to about $40 USD) is Grossmart, the semi-westernized grocery store down the street. Westernized in the sense that selection is pretty good and you're allowed to look at and touch things by yourself. There are still stores where everything is under glass, and you have to look at the selection and then say what you want. But Russianized in that there are a bunch of people employed to stand around and stare at you to make sure you aren't stealing something, and you have to check any extra bags at the door before you can shop, so you don't smuggle food into your bag and walk out with it.

On the opposite extreme is really small change - kopecks. Everyone hates kopecks. It's a game to see who gets stuck with them. During the past week, I've received an avalanche of kopeck-change from buses and marshrukas.

This morning on the bus, I counted out 7 rubles, almost all in 10 or 50-kopeck coins. I passed it to the ticket lady, who swore and asked me if it was really 7 rubles. I said yes, of course. As I sat and watched her count, I felt a moment of personal victory at winning the change game - for today, at least.

Dom Knege

2007-01-18T08:38:00.000-08:00

We quickly discovered a favorite spot in Petersburg. Dom Knege (House of Books). Most wonderful about this place (aside from, obviously, the fact that it is full of books) was the cafe on the top floor. Dom Knege was recently upgraded and modernized, and being a bit tired and hungry, we were very happy to find a cafe on the top floor. Someone has traveled outside of Russia and seen Barnes and Noble. It was good and not expensive. More importantly, we snagged window seats, from which we were able to people-watch for hours everyone going to and fro beneath us. Dom Knege became a default hangout and meeting place for the rest of the trip. On 25 December, they recognized "American" Christmas by hanging Santa hats on all of the pictures in the cafe.

Peter

2007-01-17T10:49:00.000-08:00

As the locals call it, is a beautiful city. It reminds me a little of San Francisco. Perhaps simply because they're both port cities, but something in its character felt like home.

I do love water and I liked the canals. I wanted to try to go canoeing (sp?) but no one else seemed up for it. Here is an amazing view in front of the apartment where I stayed.

We spent 3 hours at the Hermitage and barely made a dent in it. You can see me hanging out with Puskin by the entrance to the Russian Museum.

Health 101

2007-01-17T05:50:00.000-08:00

Much like seatbelts, refrigerators seem to be optional. I noticed this first with dairy products such as milk and cream, but then it dawned on me I was simply observing small data points in a much larger trend.

This should have been a warning.

Just before break, we had a "Russian lunch" where the staff here cooked traditional Russian foods. The next day, I went rummaging in the fridge for leftovers (a favorite money saving trick in any part of the world. Plus, hey, then I wouldn't have to cook).

"Nicole, the salyanka (a certain soup) is in the garage fridge."

(inner voice: wow, I didn't know we had a fridge in the garage. In fact I've never really even been in the garage.)

So, I stepped out into the garage where I learned that "fridge" meant the soup was sitting in a big pot, balancing precariously on the edge of a box. I experienced this inner struggle between my American half, which said 'this is a dumb idea', and my lazy half, which said 'all the Russian staff thinks this is normal and it hasn't killed them'.

Several hours later, I was sitting in a restaurant with my students to celebrate our end of semester party. A wave of nausea and a quick trip to the restroom convinced me to never, ever, ever "eat from the garage fridge" again.

Last winter was one for the books, with temperatures dipping to -40*C. I think usually, it's so cold for so long during the year that it's normal to leave things sitting out. This year posts record highs, with no significant snow sticking on the ground as we approach late January.

Box Envy

2007-01-15T06:13:00.000-08:00

I decided I have the coolest friends in the world. So this is a thank you to everyone. As I think my sister put it, "your friends know how to be friends over long distances". And it's true. There's been a steady stream of packages with all sorts of nifty goodies inside and I get terribly excited every time I get a slip saying there's something sitting at the post office. In case you were wondering, this is where the chocolate, goldfish, tea and coffee go. Supporting morale on the front lines of American EFL instruction.

(this is also a belated thank you for all the mail you sent while I was in Iraq - leading members of my office to exclaim, "dang, LT, your friends send you more stuff than my wife does!")

So, here's to you guys...

This was a box opening commemorated at the beginning of last semester. I think I'm throwing or hitting someone with a red pen. I'm not exactly sure. Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, I get a little carried away.

Nocerig

2007-01-14T21:53:00.000-08:00

Our first official outing in Kiev was to the zoopark. The weather was slightly brisk, but nice enough and I haven't been to a zoo in a long time so I enjoyed walking around looking at all the animals. We saw tigers and giraffes and camels and snakes and fish and warm-weather penguins from South America (Peru?) and birds and peacocks and bison and ducks and an elephant.

Alas, alack, we did not find the nocerig anywhere. Heartbreaking. And I love its name so much. I'll let you guess what this animal is in English.

And please, no thumbing your nose at the animals.

Sneaky

2007-01-14T21:41:00.000-08:00

First, sneaky is the snow that snuck in sometime last night or early this morning.

But next, it's me...I got up early today to creep out of the apartment without disturbing my host family, who would likely panic and want to know 1) why I was awake so early? 2) why I was leaving the house with wet hair? 3) why was I leaving without eating an entire frying pan's worth of fried egg fluff with cheese and grease in it? (to each their own - I just like fruit and cereal sometimes)

I was doing so well. I had my laptop and my shoulder bag all bundled up and stuffed with copies of my paper-in-progress and dripping tomes with titles such as "The Use of Force: Military Power and International Politics", "From War to Peace: Fateful Decisions in International Politics" and "America's Role in Nation-Building: From Germany to Iraq" that nearly scattered across the floor of the marshruka (van-taxi)as I stumbled into a seat. But I did not anticipate the presence of snowflakes that had been piling onto the ground while I slept, or the wind that blew small pieces of them into my eyes and hair.

It is quieter when it snows. I'm glad I saw it in the early morning before anyone else got to.

Sneaky is also Gosha, the American Home cat, who jumped into my lap suddenly when I was midway through a sentence about why America would benefit from increased participation in multinational conflict management. He pretends like he wants to hang out on my lap, but really I know he's just eying my sweater, which does handle double duty as a claw-sharpener.

The Nicest People I Know

2007-01-13T04:08:00.000-08:00

On my last day of class, I passed out my cell phone and email address so my students could keep in touch. During the holiday, I was rather touched to receive text messages from several of them. Many wrote on Dec 25th because they know this is "American" or new calendar Christmas and they wanted to wish me well. I was impressed that they a) remembered Americans would be celebrating Christmas on this day b) thought of me, even though I was no where near Vladimir at the time and c) sent me some very long messages wishing me well.

Here are some of their notes: "Hello Nicole. Merry Christmas. May all your dreams come true." "Nicole hello. Merry Christmas. I wish you a happy holiday, successes in your life and the best in the world for you. I wait our new meeting." "I am sorry Nicole that it is night, but I want to congratulate you with Christmas! I wish you patience, good luck! You are one of the best teachers! Don't miss about house! Believe in yourself and your will succeed! Urrah!"

And even on New Years - "Hello Nicole! I congratulate you on the New Year! May you have happiness in the year ahead!"

As you can see, holidays are important in Russia, and everyone shares in celebrating them. Our winter break was a good two weeks (it might be the most relaxing I've ever done in the past ten years). The New York Times even wrote a funny article about it a few days ago which you can read at http://nytimes.com/aponline/world/AP-Russia-The-Long-Holiday.html

Traffic

2007-01-10T09:17:00.000-08:00

Is unnecessarily dangerous. Unlike California, there is no such concept as pedestrian right-of-way. This confused me for my first 3 days in Russia.

On Day 2, as my host brother escorted me to my new place of employment and we darted across traffic, he noted: "Don't worry! No one has been killed in this spot for two years." And this is a statistic for a city to be proud of??! As one teacher put it, "Russia is the only country where you can get hit by a car while walking on the sidewalk" since cars drive everywhere and anywhere they want to at any moment.

One night we were driving around the city when we saw a car wreck surrounded by several ambulances. "Nekolye, see what can happen when you walk across the street? Be careful in Russia!" WHY is this considered normal? I have noticed that my expectations of what services the government should be able to provide are higher than the average Russian citizen's.

This morning I was examining the rain/slush/ice consistency through the window when I heard a dog screaming because it was hit by a car. On the street directly in front of me. He yelled for awhile, then went running away on 3 legs, with the fourth held up in the air - hopefully towards someone or something that could help him.

Oh Russia

2007-01-10T04:30:00.000-08:00

Amongst ourselves, we've discussed the fact that everyone who studies Russia is a little bit odd. It's a country and a language that sometimes, you just love to hate.

As explained in one guidebook, "customer service as a concept does not really exist in Russia". No, no it doesn't. There is no customer service. Only a game, called Who Can Be The Biggest A----le?

I met Mandy at the post office so we could pick up some Christmas packages. It was the central post office, where people are unfriendly and I don't have any personal connections. (Personal connections are really how anything actually gets done in Russia.) Usually, I find this helpful. In the smaller post office, I am friends with the parcel lady. She knows me. She smiles and says hello when I see her. On this day, no such luck.

Post Office Drama Queen (with dramatic sighing and rolling of eyes, in Russian): Why are you here so late? I can't believe you came so late! This package has been here for a long time. You are going to have to pay money to get it from me. You shouldn't have been so late.

Me(in Russian): I was on vacation. I was in the Ukraine. I just got your note.(Inner voice: So obviously, I couldn't pick up the package. And, you've probably been closed and home drinking vodka the whole time I was away. You probably didn't even deliver the note saying I had a parcel for pickup until today.)

(( another Post Office Girl enters from state right ))

Post Office Girl: How are you? What's going on in here?

Drama Queen: Oh, these girls are foreigners and they're so stupid. They don't understand about the parcel and why they have to pay money and it's just *so* difficult for me to have to explain it to them, etc.

Mandy(in Russian): I can understand everything you're saying about us.

Drama Queen: [Flashes a fake smile accompanied by nervous laughter. Grudgingly accepts my late fee of 28 rubles and gives me my two parcels. Begins talking to Post Office Girl again about why her life is so difficult and hard...]

Hitting the Road

2007-01-10T01:07:00.000-08:00

I was so ready for our vacation...life is good here, but sometimes everyone worries so much about my well being I feel like I'm 6 yrs old. Molly and I escaped the confines of Vladimir to go running around St. Petersburg, Moscow, and Kiev, in that order and I got to be an adult and a city girl once again.

I'll start by telling you about the train. I have become much more intimately acquainted with the Russian train system, particularly night trains. The best option is to go "platzcart" which is the cheapest, and means "thrown into the mass group with everyone else". Because your train is open and full of many people walking around, it's actually safer. The next class up is "kupe" which costs a lot more and consists of 4 people in an enclosed compartment. If you don't like each other, someone smells, or someone is creepy, you're still stuck with them. Sometimes you get a little free food in kupe, but this didn't happen on one of our legs. However, we did meet some old Russian men who for some reason knew only the word "boyfriend" in English. It all worked out just fine but I have no desire to repeat the experience. Our trip was a mix of both types of travel because we bought tickets so late in the year. Everyone has a bunk/shelf they can sleep or sit on, but when you have the top, your options are pretty limited.

Here's a picture our compartment and one of the funny sign during a "kupe" leg where the train was actually clean and included food. Notice the English translations.

Ending the Semester

2007-01-06T04:49:00.000-08:00

Turned out to be a very emotional experience as I said goodbye to all my classes. On the last day, we have a party where I pass back exams and we eat/talk/hang out.

My conversation class was first, choosing to throw a dinner party in the kitchen. During some of our lessons, we've discussed art, food and music (appropriately, looking through books of impressionists and others, eating, and listening to various American genres during these times). My class sat me down and told me that to reciprocate my generous sharing of culture, they'd prepared a traditional Russian meal, which I should enjoy with them and remember always. So, there we sat, surrounded by caviar, pyrogs with meat, fruit salad, a special holiday salad with fish and beets, and a rather dangerous holiday beverage from the Ukraine known as "medavohoo" (approximate pronunciation). Several hours, a few candles, and many glasses later, our evening was complete. As one student told me, "Nekolye, celebrating the new year is a process".

The next day began with my 545 PM class of about 8 girls, who thoroughly embarassed me by standing up and clapping when I walked in, and giving me a terribly cute string of stuffed angels with "LOVE" across them. My 730 PM adult class showed up with a nesting doll and lacquer box, then dragged me to a local cafe where they insisted on buying dinner and defended me from the dubious advances of the very drunk married man at the table next to us. The next day brought more eating and cafe-ing, plus a pair of real rabbit fur gloves to protect me from 'the Russian winter' (which has yet to appear).

The worst was grading written exams, because I'd be sitting there, exasperatedly staring at the last page wondering why they couldn't have written a few more sentences on the essay and then come across a scribble at the bottom that said "Nicole, I love you" at which point I generally become useless.

Here's a picture of our conversation class.

Making Friends

2006-12-31T11:08:00.000-08:00

I've been getting to know some of my students better. Somewhere, something shifted, and I've started going out socially more often. Learning more about some of my students is fascinating. Their commitment to learning English is incredible. I spent one Sunday walking in the park, talking to a student who began studying English at home, by herself, with a pile of books and tapes. She lives in a nearby village and has to take a 30 min train to get to Vladimir. On the days that we have class, she spends the night with a host family in town because it's too late and too far to go back to her village, plus the trains don't run that often. We spent most of this day walking and talking until we were cold, and then we moved to a cafe. Since then, we've gone out to dinner, and also went to a performance at the drama theater. I knew from her journals that she liked fashion and design and used to make her own clothes and jewelry. I didn't know until we shared some pictures with each other that she also used to model. She's very tall and dramatic. It was interesting to look at the other women in her modeling class/group. Most Russian women are petite and very beautiful. In contrast to the stories of some of my American girlfriends who have modeled, no one in her group appeared overly thin or anorexic. I'm sure it happens, but this particular group looked very healthy, which I was glad to see. For Christmas, she made me a beaded bracelet, and I'm trying to figure out what on earth to do in return.

Another of my students is a competitive athlete (biathlon - skiing or running and shooting), but she really dreams of being a tour guide. We went to the art museum together and spent over three hours there :) Partly because we were both mesmerized by looking at and discussing everything, and also since we were distracted by a demonstration of ballroom dancing ettiquete, where museum staff danced with one another and explained how fans were used to indicate your level of interest in a man (I think three feathers was a good sign). She's quite indignant that many people in the city haven't explored the cultural events that do exist in Vladimir, and I forsee many more outings in our future. At the end of our museum trip, she said she was glad I could see the museum and all of its paintings, because it helped to explain Russia, its history and its people to me much better than if she had tried to in her own words. Also, it made her feel a little bit like a tour guide (which I think she would be great at).

I think it was a Wednesday night that some of the men in my class protested their exclusion after I'd gone to Baskin Robbins with the women in the class, so in support of gender equality, we all headed out to a cafe and played billiards until 1 am.

All in all, it's feeling a little bit more like home.

Orphanage

2006-12-07T11:24:00.000-08:00

Wednesday morning, we visited an orphanage. 6 of us went (4 women, 2 men). When we walked in the door, several young children started yelling.

Galya: Do you know what they're saying?
Us: No
Galya: Mama, papa, they're coming to take us home.

<knife in stomach>

We spent a few hours with the kids and some of the other teachers who work at the orphanage. I'm not sure if it was state-funded but it looked like a nice place. I think they take good care of the children. We played airplane (and were told "Only men should pick up children. We feed them. Men lift them.") Fortunately, my lack of Russian was not a barrier.

One girl hasn't been adopted yet. Her mother doesn't have custody because she's a drug addict. She keeps visiting the orphanage to tell her daughter she'll be coming home soon. Her daughter keeps waiting and believes that she'll go home one day.

We've agreed to go back - at least 4 people will come and help once a week.

Happy Thanksgiving

2006-12-02T23:44:00.000-08:00

We held our own celebration here at the American Home, cooking a great feast last Sunday for the Russian staff and our host families. My contributions included bread pudding and gravy for the turkey (yes, we actually found some turkeys in Russia!) For many of us, it was the first time we'd ever really made everything on our own. With a recipe mix of family favorites from all parts of the country, it turned out quite well. You can see us making fruit salad in the kitchen, and me stirring the pot of gravy on the stove.

No Snow

2006-12-01T01:25:00.000-08:00

The weather has been very strange lately. Last winter was one of the coldest in recent memory. This winter is uncertain, but shaping up to be one of the warmest. All of the snow has melted, leaving a constant wet drizzle accompanied by large swaths of mud in its wake.

Global warming?

It feels more like late fall on the east coast than anything else. I kind of like it except we're all getting sick.

Surprise

2006-11-16T05:37:00.000-08:00

You know, at times I'm a little ambivalent about teaching. At the beginning of the week, I was still thinking about the weekend. I walked into my first class Monday evening to find this...sometimes my students really know how to make me smile :)

Homesick

2006-11-09T05:06:00.000-08:00

So I'm struggling a little. I was hiding it, but it's time to share. I miss the U S of A. I was also ecstatic to "open" the New York Times this morning and see that Secretary Rumsfeld has resigned, and Congress has changed. The question now is what the future will bring.

We've just finished a short holiday. While I'd planned to go traveling, I stayed here to work on a paper for school. Halfway through I became quite envious of everyone in Moscow and Petersburg. Sunday night, my sister messaged me (much cheaper than calling).

"Why must 'going out' consist only of getting obscenely drunk in the hotel lobby?"
"It's just a phase...they'll grow out of it."
"I'm in Moscow and no one wants to go out...they just want to sit here and drink. I'm coming to see you tomorrow. Make time for me. What tangible items do you miss?"

I said I missed San Francisco and my hairdresser (she was fabulous and I really need a haircut).

Around lunchtime, we met at "our cafe" (Cafe Montana - don't know how it got its name). They have the best hot chocolate (garachi shocolade) in the world. Russian hot chocolate tastes like warm brownie batter. AND they're friendly (no one is friendly in Russia. The customer is always wrong). Continuing with the food obession theme, we walked to the American Home for a special lunch. Commenting wryly on my choice of "San Francisco" as the tangible item I missed, my sister informed me that she'd brought North Beach to Vladimir. Out came a bottle of Italian wine, some olives, French cheese, a baguette and (wonders) assorted Italian meat, including salami and proschiutto. In contrast to Russian black bread, meat ravioli with funny bits you can't chew in it, and cheese with a weird aftertaste.

We didn't do anything dramatic, just spent some time together eating and talking, and watching part of "Dead Poets Society". Later that night, I threw in the CD of saxophone music a friend had bought at the Hayes St Jazz Festival, lit a candle, pulled out my Fleximap of San Francisco and looked at every spot on it I'd ever walked or visited.

Yep, I've got it bad.

Today, I'm teaching a lesson about culture shock. According to our text, culture shock is a process whose 4 steps look like an AA agenda:
1) the tourist stage - you will have a positive attitude. Everything will feel new and exciting!
2) the emptiness stage - after only a few weeks, you will have settled into your daily routine. The original excitement you felt will have disappeared. Everything will seem so different, confusing and disappointing!
3) the acceptance stage - at this point, you will have accepted the cultural differences of the new country. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the point when you are about to move back home!
4) the recovery stage - by this time, you will have been living in your new home for several months. You will start to feel more relaxed.

Penguin

2006-11-06T03:36:00.000-08:00

The doorbell rang. She stood, authoritatively, at the top of the steps leading to my apartment. "I'm here for Nicole". I fumbled for my house keys, threw a hat on my head, hoped my socks were thick enough and off we went.

"Nekol, speak Russian. You are the English teacher; I am the Russian teacher."
"But I can't speak Russian."
"I speak English in class. You speak Russian with me."
"Your English is like this", I protest feebly in Russian, holding my hand above my head - "my Russian is like this", holding my hand below my knee.
"Nekol, speak Russian".

It's not a request.

She's really enjoying this. She had to retake her midterm exam. A motivated student, she's missed a few classes, but the strength and vibrancy of her personality is in no way lessened by her imperfect grammar on my test, an arbitrary attempt to measure her "skill" and "learning progress" in this one subject area where I am somehow qualified to provide instruction.

"I don't know how to skate."
"In Russian, please."
(!@#$%)

I step onto the ice, shakily.
"Are you scared?".

Oooo she knows how to push my buttons.

She's tall and lean and naturally graceful. She grabs my left hand and drags me across the ice as I sway back and forth, yell, and search desperately for some element of form resembling her smooth, effortless motions across the ice.

Some 6 year olds skate by, turning circles and going backwards. A few drunk, roughhousing young men follow soon after. I try not to fall or get hit. I stare obssessively at my feet, trying to make them move like the other feet on the rink.

Eventually, I stop looking at my feet and start looking at the ice. I move in jerky circles around the middle, where the slower skaters are. Every so often, she stops to check on me, grabbing my hand and pulling me off for some "adult circles" around the loop, which means we move must faster than where my comfort zone is.

She's 15 or 16 years old, maybe.

I watch the lights and the music and think that I'd be more at home in a dance club. I grit my teeth and try to forget that I'm wearing skates two sizes too small since that's all they had.

When they stop to clean the ice, we decide to go home. We walk through the park to a bus stop as she puffs on her cigarette. She used to live near this park, and would run around in it when she was a little girl. She still likes to come here with her grandparents for the New Year, where they have a great celebration. I promise that if I stay in Vladimir for New Years, I will come to the park with her. We are speaking in Russian. She corrects my small words for me.

We get on the bus and leave Penguin, the skating rink. My feet hurt, but I had fun.

First Snow

2006-11-05T03:49:00.000-08:00

Quietly and unexpectedly, it crept in while we were sleeping. Yesterday I opened the window to find several white inches on the ground. I was so excited I walked all the way to school so I could look at it. There is a special silence that comes with new snow, and it's beautiful and magic before anyone walks on it or makes it dirty.

Happy Halloween

2006-11-05T03:40:00.000-08:00

Belatedly. We threw a grand party for our students last Saturday, with an earlier one for the kids and a later one for the adults. Between the costume contest, haunted house, limbo competition, pumpkin carving, murder mystery, dancing, and bobbing for apples, it was quite a hit. My proudest moment was when my youngest and most enthusiastic student won the costume contest for being Harry Potter (only he didn't dress any differently than he usually does!). Here I am with some of my students.

Circadian

2006-10-27T03:33:00.000-07:00

The sun woke me up this morning. Though I still had trouble leaping out of bed and being outrageously productive, which was my intent before I went to sleep last night.

High Fashion

2006-10-18T10:48:00.000-07:00

Molly and I have really been bonding. We both went to school in Colorado. We suffer through Wed night conversation classes together. Tonight, we realized something truly special.

There I was, telling a story about class... watching Molly's eyes get bigger and bigger while she stared harder and harder at my leg...and finally blurted out "Nicole, we have the same socks!"

And so we do. What good taste. Here we are in all our glory.

Julia Child

2006-10-15T05:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Sara and I spent many hours together at the American Home (an event indistinguishable from other days, except that it was Saturday and everyone else had already gone home). Around 830 PM we finally left, and she invited me over for dinner, which made us both happy. Opening the fridge, we found an amazing supply of meat and cheese, which we duly divided into two portions. To supplement our hearty feast, we sliced an onion and a tomato into a frying pan, added some rice, and the essential Russian cooking ingredient - cracked an egg over the top. It came out rather well. I think we're ready for our own show.

Identity Confusion

2006-10-15T03:54:00.000-07:00

I love the plaque at the bottom of this monument. Russia's current identity isn't very clear but despite sometimes feeling more Soviet than European, this note tells us that part of history is over:

Built in 1829
Destroyed in 1931
Rebuilt in 2005

I'm not sure what the monument is for, but I guess it wasn't popular during the Communist era.

Novie Opit (new experience)

2006-10-10T13:34:00.000-07:00

Yaroslavl: yar a slavl (n) 1: a grand adventure 2: a state of exhaustion reached after prolonged sleeplessness 3: an ancient and beautiful city in Russia

Our story begins Saturday morning at the Autovokzal (bus station). Despite losing my first ticket, I was able to buy another one and talk my way onto the bus with the help of the station manager. The trip took 5 hrs and included a stop in Ivanova - the most depressing city I've ever seen, whose main industries are fabrics and textiles. Yaroslavl is bigger than Vladimir, but smaller than Nizhny Novgorod.

We visited many churches, including "Elijah the Prophet" and another undergoing repairs where we befriended a woman working in the store, who has a daughter our age and gave us all small icons for our wallets. The Volga was beautiful, during the day and when we walked along it at night. To save money, we stayed up all night instead of getting a hotel. I have many stories from this trip, but for now, I just wanted to share pictures of the city.

Gentlewoman Caller

2006-10-04T09:47:00.000-07:00

Sasha came to Vladimir this weekend. Catching a train from St. Petersburg to Moscow and then here, I met her at the train station and we ate lunch with friends at an Azerbaijani restaurant. Saturday night, we walked in the park and watched a traveling street performer wave fire around. There was something so reassuring and comfortable about having a family member in town. Her host family sent us apples from their dacha, and my host family had a huge dinner party. I discovered my host mother drinks after all, and had to do 2.5 vodka shots with her, though I'd avoided it so far this trip. Everyone had fun. On Sunday we went to the cathedral and for a long walk around town. The leaves are beautiful right now.

Burning Bright

2006-09-29T07:52:00.000-07:00

Yesterday during my Russian lesson I read a dialogue about a cat named "Taiga". Thinking I was smart, I figured the cat was named after its wild counterpart the tiger. But no. The cat is named for "taiga", the forest in Siberia where summer temperatures exceed 100 F and winter digits hit -80 F.

I scream

2006-09-27T10:00:00.000-07:00

You scream. Today I made brownies for our teachers meeting and they were a big success (Dad, thanks for the mix). After the meeting, I met with 3 of my students (girls) for a trip to Baskin Robbins, where I had one scoop of mango and one of some other kind of fruit. In Russia, you can order a pot of tea at Baskin Robbins and purchase small tea cakes to go with it. The tea and the ice cream were delicious. The girls wanted to know what was different about Baskin Robbins in Russia and America. I told them their Baskin Robbins was nicer. We looked at photos of each other, watched people walking outside, and talked about what movies and books we like. I was so excited to have my very own social event outside of work. It made my life in Vladimir more real but I'm still partly in transition limbo. I'm beginning to understand more of what I hear, but I can't say much yet.

Football

2006-09-27T09:38:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, our students were invited to the American Home to play American football and watch a movie. 5 or 6 of my students came along with many others. One of my older students was happy just to sit in the leaves and watch. She is an overworked perfectionist, so I was glad to see her having fun.

I played photographer at the beginning, but then disappeared upstairs to get my darn paper written. One down, 7 to go... (grad school's taking a year longer than it was supposed to)

Why Vladimir is Beautiful

2006-09-25T05:31:00.000-07:00

Many of you have asked what Russia looks like. You wonder if the landscape is bleak and desolate, or rugged and mountainous. Right now we are in the midst of a gorgeous Indian summer. Here are some reasons why I think this is a beautiful city.

Suzdal

2006-09-24T23:58:00.000-07:00

The name of a nearby town which makes me think of bubble baths. Suzdal is famous for its churches and cucumbers, and I had the opportunity to experience both on our day-trip. We went to my favorite museum ever, an architectural one that was all outdoors and consisted of wooden churches, peasant and rich man huts and windmills, some of which were very old. The most amazing thing is that they didn't use any nails in the construction.

At lunchtime, we walked around looking for a nearby restaurant, and instead encountered a group of elderly peddlers intent on selling us cucumbers. Their own individual versions of pickling-in-progress cucumbers. Since we were clearly a large group of American students, we lost the argument, and bought 2 or 3 different kinds.

That day, Suzdal was having a festival (I think it was their city day). We walked the streets, looked at souvenirs and bought ice cream. Then we decided to ride one of those carnival rides. The kind that looks really fun but maybe doesn't meet OSHA standards or whoever governs that stuff. Our ride appeared to be set of van seats chained and duct taped to a frame, that flipped and spun you upside down. Eric and I convinced each other it was a good idea to ride it.

Class Act

2006-09-20T00:43:00.000-07:00

By the end of the first day of teaching, we were all exhausted. Getting everything ready, working until 9 PM and trying to figure out who our students were and what we were doing took its toll. We were supposed to have a post-teaching meeting to talk about how it went. I was in no mood for a meeting. I wanted to go home, eat and sleep.

Imagine my surprise when I stumbled into the dining room to see it set with a huge feast for all the teachers - a celebration in honor of the first day. Alexi proclaimed "you launched it!" and we all ate dinner and toasted each other. I loved it. I was so impressed. I can't imagine anything like that happening back home.

After dinner, I picked up a broom to help clear crumbs from the floor. Alexi, with his camera ever at the ready, snapped a quick photo shouting "1920s Housewife in the Kitchen" and lauging uproariously.

Getting to Know You

2006-09-19T07:49:00.000-07:00

Every year we decorate the classrooms with a certain theme. This year, we decorated them according to different decades in American history. The eras we chose: the 20s, 50s, 60s, and 80s. (Our central classroom was themed after Ellis Island). Bob and I were in charge of the 20s, so our classroom was titled "The Speakeasy" and covered with references to Prohibition, women's suffrage, Lindbergh's flight, flappers, zoot suits, art deco, expatriate authors and absinthe in Paris, the Harlem Renaissance and big band jazz/swing/Duke Ellington, and Black Tuesday.

This theme carried over into our introductory skits for the students. On the first day of class, teachers traditionally perform some sort of skit to explain to the students who we are and which class we will be teaching. At the beginning we told the students that this year, the American Home had a time machine and we would travel through different decades to find teachers. Representing the 1920s, I dressed up as a flapper, and Bob and I walked out and danced to some big band music for all the students. Our first audience loved it, and began cheering and clapping. Other groups were quiter but I think they all liked it, and we definitely had fun.

Sweet Saxophone

2006-09-17T06:28:00.000-07:00

The other weekend, we attended a jazz festival in honor of city day (the city celebrates its birthday with a big street festival full of ice cream, balloons and various forms of entertainment). The group that played travels here infrequently from Moscow, and Galya bought all the teachers tickets as a gift. They were very good and I really enjoyed listening to them. They played a lot of big band music, which was entertaining in light of my being a flapper for our school skit, and they also adapted Russian classics like "Song of the Volga Boatmen" to jazz. I wish you could have been there. Duke Ellington was present, among others. It was a big night.

Dacha

2006-09-17T05:50:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, we made
the long-awaited, eagerly-anticipated trek to Tanya's dacha, just outside the city, for a picnic/barbeque. It was really, really cold. I say this as a Californian/Georgian/whatever. I had to wear long underwear. And a hat and gloves and scarf. And boots. And a sweater. And a jacket. It was crazy. I really can't picture sub-zero temperatures.

We cooked some delicious shashlik, ate grapes, tomatoes, spicy string cheese and squares of lavash wrapped with (I think) feta and maybe cilantro inside - accompanied by some mulled wine. We went on a short excursia to the hollowed out remnant of an old church, and walked around the woods looking at a big dry spot that used to be a lake and anything else we came across. We stepped carefully across a short plank over a small stream. Between the mulled wine, my being sick, and the cold, I opted to go back inside the dacha and sleep while everyone else drank tea and played basketball.

It was a good weekend and I was happy to be outdoors.

The American Home Exposed

2006-09-08T04:46:00.001-07:00

I know what you are thinking. You want to know where exactly I work. You are a little confused. Something about a school in Russia and English classes. You're afraid there are Chechen rebels running around. You are not really sure what, precisely, I am doing here. (see I can read minds)

Let me put your fears at ease.

To your left is a lovely photo of the American Home. This is where we work/live/teach/argue/play. This is not a Russian school. It is a private organization run by a professor in Illinois, and what we will do on a given day is sometimes as much a mystery to us as it is to you.

On a basic level, we teach English, yes ~400 students a semester, with many more on a waiting list if we only had the space and staff to teach more classes. The ages, capabilites and motivations of our students are very different. In one class, my youngest student can't be much more than 9 yrs and my oldest is in his mid 40s. Many adults and university students want to improve their English to help in their job or to study abroad.

But we also help with local projects and tourism. This weekend a group of visitors arrived from Illinois to have tea with us. They all support and helped to create the American Home and wanted to learn about us and why we came to Russia. They brought gifts, important ones: coffee and peanut butter :) A few weeks ago, two of our teachers went to a local auto parts company to voiceover a commercial they were filming. On the weekend, a few more teachers played basketball on the "American team" in a local tournament. Today, 2 TV stations and a newspaper stopped by to interview Americans for a retrospective on 9/11. A few weeks ago, we met with a group of students attending an English language camp to discuss American culture. You never know what will happen next.

We end up becoming involved in our students' lives. You're the teacher, but for many, you're also their "american friend" which has certain bragging rights. Your students will invite you out to go walking and do things with them, which is not a bad way to learn more about Vladimir or Russia.

Lucky Birch Tree

2006-09-07T04:06:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, we took the train to Nizhny Novgorod (aka Gorky). The city girl in me was midly homesick. Nizhny is bigger than Vladimir, but small enough to be more managable than Moscow. The weather was perfect and we walked all around the city. On the side of a hill grows a lucky birch tree. When a couple gets married, the groom (I think it's always the groom) climbs the tree and ties a ribbon on it - the higher you can place it, the more luck you will have. Here is one lucky gentleman who succeeded in making the trip.

Sherpa

2006-09-01T09:21:00.000-07:00

I had 2 packages at the post office. When you have a package, they send you a slip so you know it's there. You show up with your passport to claim it. The post office is several blocks down the street. It was a nice day so I decided to walk. I couldn't find the post office at first, so I walked in circles for a bit. Once I found it, I realized the slip I needed to claim my package was at school. So I walked back.

I returned to the post office an hour later to find there were 10 minutes left in their afternoon break. Breaks are very serious in Russia. There is no evading someone's scheduled break. The package lady put the boxes on a scale and said something. I thought she was asking for money - if you don't pick up your mail right away, they charge you for storage, and I was running a few days late - so I pulled out my wallet, and she laughed. After some pantomime I was able to understand that she was reciting the weight so I knew it matched the customs form and that the package had not been disturbed in transit.

Concerned about the weight of the boxes, she tied string around them so they'd be easier to carry. Balancing both in my arms, I found them awkward, not because of weight so much as my short arms. I walked back to school, recieving many odd stares. I don't think women normally carry anything here. Probably not boxes that reach above their head.

Excited to be close to the school, I crossed the street at a green pedestrian light, not really looking around since I had the right of way - to the great fury of a Russian fire truck barreling down the road (honking when it saw me but not making any noise before that).

My parents, bless them, sent us enough red pens for the entire school year, in addition to any items mentioned in the "Teacher Handbook" that I had not packed, including extra nylons and a scientific calculator. Plus some very cool Pioneer keychains to hand out to my students. All the essentials of life...

First Day of School

2006-09-01T06:02:00.000-07:00

Olga with her flowers

Not my school. "Regular" school. The first day of class in Russia is celebratory - almost a holiday. Turned out in their finest, even young children wear suits and students bring flowers for their teachers. My host mother is a school teacher so I got to watch the first day festivities. The beginning was very solemn, with 2 serious young women flanking a serious young man who carried the Russian flag around a circle of students, stopping at center stage where they stood, immobile, for the rest of the ceremony. Parents and grandparents came to watch the show.

Students took turns singing, speaking, parading in groups according to their class year, and passing out flowers. Someone asked if I was new, and I wasn't sure if they meant parent or student, but I simply said "yes" and moved before they asked more questions. I followed my host mother to her class and listened to her explain that I was an American, staying at her house and that I didn't speak Russian :)

When I was growing up, my mother sent us to school with flowers. This gesture was not always understood by other students, or our teacher.

Cinderella

2006-09-01T05:45:00.000-07:00

Another Russian custom (practiced in other countries, too) is the removal of your shoes upon entry into a house or apartment. Street shoes are replaced by Russian house slippers called tapochki. In winter especially they are important because streets are so dirty and you trek snow everywhere. They come in various colors, styles and levels of quality ranging from sporty plastic Adidas types to girly glittery to soft and fuzzy or plain and simple.

An outing to the local "mall" became a group effort To Help Nicole, OfNonDiminuitive MetatarsalsWhoCannotSpeakRussian, Find Tapochki. It took a couple of stores, but I finally found a beautiful blue pair made in Kiev, Ukraine - my very own, they have flowers and are supposed to last a few years if I take care of them (we shall see what survives the winter).

Small Talk

2006-08-26T08:14:00.000-07:00

The first two weeks have been quite busy. Jet lag is a convenient scapegoat, but even without it, adapting to a new environment can be exhausting. My host family is wonderful. The day I arrived, we had a huge meal and a few neighbors even showed up. I really don't know any Russian but I do understand what "kooshetz!!" means (thank you babushka). This term is usually addressed as a command, often accompanied by emphatic gesturing with a wooden spoon, and means "EAT! Eat, now, and keep eating..." It's said that an empty plate is viewed as a challenge to a Russian hostess and I think this may be true.

The cat meows loudly at me all the time. Supposedly this is a normal part of her adjustment process with new Americans. (my host family has some experience in this matter)

I never realized what an emotional process learning a new language can be. During the first week, we had survival Russian classes. It seems almost everyone else was a Russian major in school so I spent a few days moping around and being exasperated that I couldn't gain fluency in 7 days. (James Bond does NOT make it look this hard) Sitting in the classroom for my one-on-one lessons, I suddenly understood the thought process our students will have when they walk through the door. Hopefully this will help me be a better teacher.

About 2 days into the trip, I decided enough was enough and it was time to start talking. I brought my pocket dictionary to breakfast determined to make conversation. The food is delicious and I flipped through the dictionary, strung some words together in my head and proudly told my host mother "You are a good oven". She burst out laughing; I learned that dictionaries aren't all they're cracked up to be, and that the words for oven and cook are remarkably similar. But hey, I'm trying, right? And the joke kept us going for the rest of the week.

Ou est le Doublevay Say?

2006-08-26T06:54:00.000-07:00

Bathrooms are much more utilitarian in Russia. Since everyone lives in a small apartment, the bathroom is similar to a garage or attic and becomes a catch-all for miscellaneous storage. Logical, but it really threw me the first time I walked in. Part of the reason Americans use so much more water than anyone else is probably because of how clean, shiny and fun our bathrooms are to spend time in. You want to take a 30 min shower and fiddle with your new sunscreen and your electric toothbrush in front of the big mirror and the fluffy towels and the candles.

We don't have hot water right now. This is a seasonal, geographically rotating normality. If I understand correctly, much of the pipe/water maintenance is done in the summer when weather conditions are nicest. Certain sections of the city will be without hot water for indeterminate lengths of time. (There are official estimates. Amazingly, these are rarely accurate.) Once work in a section is completed, maintenance moves to the next area, and they get to freeze for awhile.

For the first week, I took cold showers at home, insisting it was no problem as I didn't want my host mother to have to heat a bunch of water on the stove to try to fix it. Invigorating. Remniscent of camping. I even found a mosquito who wanted to keep me company. OK, so I miss my American bathroom.

My shower routine goes like this: I stand in the tub and pick up the detachable shower head. I lean over and rinse just my hair. I shampoo, rinse it out, do sort of a quick general scrub, and jump out of the bathtub. There is a wooden platform stacked on the end of the tub, with 3 or 4 pots sitting on it. So there I am, standing in the bathtub. And I'm trying to wash my hair without running into the pots, or dripping on the floor because there is no shower curtain or anything and if I move my head in the wrong direction it will send water drops flying over the edge onto the floor, and if I move myself in the wrong direction I will run into the pots.

Moskva

2006-08-25T05:38:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, as part of our Group Bonding experience, we took the morning train to Moscow - the closest major city, it's 2.5hrs by train (faster than driving). Since we have all been there before, no one was in a great hurry to see tourist attractions. August is a peak month for visiting and the crowds in line to see Lenin's tomb proved it.

I visited Moscow once before, in the winter of 1997. It felt very different then. Red Square was more exotic and less touristy. Now, everything has been repainted and looks a little bit too perfect. Moscow is obviously wealthier and much more expensive than I remember, though I have no idea how proportionately this wealth is distributed.

Realizing that we kept bickering about what to do next because our group was too large, we split up to look at different things. Eric and I ended up wandering the city and people-watching, which quickly regressed into looking for park benches to nap on. Several benches, bottles of water and bookstores later, it was time to head back to the train station.

We got there in plenty of time. Really. Despite my sense of direction. Early, even. I haggled with a pirog vendor for some greasy food. We checked the schedule. It began to rain. We walked to the train. It wasn't there.

Departure time approached quickly. We asked for directions - and received 6 different sets. Running through several tunnels, staircases, and side streets - we kept looking for the train but couldn't find it. We began to sprint.

We found the train, but there was a fence in the way. I considered jumping it. At this point we had been running for several minutes. We found a path around the fence, and ran to the train. The doors were closed and it was ready to leave. We pounded on windows and doors begging for someone to help us. We found an open window - and a very suprised man in the restroom. We kept running down the side of the platform. Attracting the attention of a ticket lady, we knocked on the door and held up our tickets. She said something, turned and disappeared. The train began to pull away and the doors were still closed. We banged lounder. The train jerked, stopped, and she opened the door. We slipped in, thanked her and made a long walk, dripping rain and sweat, through the nicest cabin back to the least expensive, where we were all sitting.

A close call, but we made it. 2 more seconds and we would have missed it. A little blurry, but we took a picture to commemorate the moment.

Twas the Night Before

2006-08-04T11:57:00.000-07:00

And here I sit, drinking tea since the coffee ran out and wondering what I leave undone.

T Minus ~ 12 hours. Delta flies nonstop to Moscow. Which, depending on your view, may be advantageous. Downside: No layover in Amsterdam. Upside: I have an aisle seat.

I am very conscious of what I pack. I don't want to show up with more clothes than my whole family owns. Jeans, tshirts, a suit, some girly clothes, workout gear for cross-country skiing, running, and the biking club Vladimir supposedly has, warm clothes (whatever they are) and a little black dress so I can crash embassy parties.

There are 6 mosquito bites on my arm and 2 on my toe.
Yesterday, the dog peed on my brand-new, beautiful, red Swiss Army luggage.
My only good jeans are somewhere in the 25 sealed moving boxes decorating the living room.

It is customary to arrive with small gifts when you visit someone. So if you go over for dinner, bring flowers or chocolates. I need something nice to give my family when I get there. I have an MP3 player for my host brother, a small cologne for dad, but I don't know what to get mom yet. (the Victoria's Secret Pink dog?)

The atomic clock at the Naval Observatory says it's late. Time to crash. Love you all, and thanks for the nonstop phone calls between 6 PM and midnight.

Welcome

2006-05-31T19:14:00.000-07:00

To keep in touch with everyone, I am posting stories of my adventures during the next year. My new career? English language instructor at The American Home in Vladimir, Russia, east of Moscow. You can read about "us" at http://www.serendipity-russia.com/newteachers.htm